I finished rereading A.S. Byatt’s The Children’s Book. Last time I read it I wrote myself a hangover cure: visit the V&A museum, take up pottery, frolic in the English countryside, read Peter Pan, drink tea, sleep.
So, behold, a collection of cures for that book that made you suffer: the best of the reading remedies.
Normal People Remedy: sleep in the same bed as your best friend, drink champagne from coupes, write long emails you’ve composed in your head, eat chocolate spread with a teaspoon, wish you were normal
The Pisces Remedy: move to California, delete tinder, have sex on the beach, read Sappho, get a goldfish
1Q84 Remedy: look at the moon, listen to Janáček’s Sinfonietta, go to a playground at night, read In Search of Lost Time
There but for the Remedy: host a dinner party, begin your sentences with ‘the fact is…’, spend a day away from google, always be just a little late, feed liquorice to a rabbit
Idaho Remedy: take your goats for a walk, learn to play the piano, sleep on top of the covers, speak in iambic pentameter, don’t drink lemonade
Devotion Remedy: learn to ice skate, go to Paris, drink black coffee, bake bread, fall asleep while reading (and let the book permeate your dreams), write while on a train
Everything Under Remedy: go to the river, forget, drink wine from teacups, write your own language, call your mother
Attrib Remedy: buy a thesaurus (and use it), speak you mind on public transport, make breakfast for your lover, google the paintings of the sistine chapel, scoop leaves from the swimming pool
The Virgin Suicides Remedy: have sex on the roof, save the trees, wear white, don’t go to the party, drink peach schnapps
Outline Remedy: swim in the ocean, stop talking (only listen), read Sophie Collin’s ‘Who is Mary Sue?’, make space for passion, look at old photographs of yourself, eat honey by the spoon